“The difference between a successful person and others is not a lack of strength, not a lack of knowledge, but rather a lack of will.” – Vince Lombardi
Life has definitely thrown me a few curve balls lately. With handling my Grandma’s medical care, her getting sick and me having to spend so much time up at the hospital, all while trying to keep up with five kids, working, and launching a few things of my own, I certainly feel like I’ve bitten off more than I can chew. As of now, I have two sick kids (one puking everywhere), a school conference in the morning (I need to reschedule), 35 people coming to my son’s birthday party in the afternoon, a meeting about a potential gig in the evening, and long laundry list of things to get done before then. On top of all of this, I just learned my grandma is scheduled to undergo heart surgery at 9am tomorrow.
I often joke that I’m a professional juggler. We all know though, that what goes up, must come down, and it just so happens that sometimes everything comes down at once. This is FOR SURE one of those times. I’m tired, a bit overwhelmed, and in the past few days I’ve been (more than) a little grumpy. I certainly hadn’t planned for all of the curve balls that have come my way. That said, I understand the importance of figuring out how to stay focused, how to keep my eye on the prize, when things aren’t going as planned. So this morning I
found took some time to be still, quiet, and listen as I was thinking about how to handle it all. What came to me was the importance of setting my intention. The definition of intention is: “to have in mind a purpose or plan, to direct the mind, to aim.” With things quickly starting to feel like they were spinning out of control, I knew I needed to set my intention based on the understanding of what matters most to me. I had to make a commitment to align my actions with my inner values.
Given the unknown and sometimes craziness of life, I realized there’s never been a more important time to dream and to set our intentions. We must live intentionally and be tenacious in doing so. There are going to be times in life when all hell breaks loose, when life hands us a shit sandwich, and things happen that are beyond our control. There’s no question about it. It’s a given. That doesn’t mean we give up. Having dreams (goals) and setting our intention can give us fortitude for dealing with the tough times. During those times, we simply just have to remind ourselves what we originally set out to do. This morning (in the blissful quietness) I was reminded of my purpose, and set my intention to live through this process with grace and a fierce determination. In doing so, I came up with a few key things that I intend to focus on during challenging times. Perhaps, they will help you, too:
Quit Feeling Like A Victim
It really is a waste of time, thinking “why me?” I’ve wasted so much energy, in the past, going over this question like a mantra and yet, this questioning has not helped me one single bit. So my first suggestion is to stop the victim mentality.
You see, when you ask yourself “why me”, you are essentially saying that you are not equipped to handle the situation. Which is entirely untrue. As Glinda the Good Witch from the Wizard of Oz says–“You have always had the power”
I think of this quote often when I get “stuck” in life – whether I am trying to make a decision, get through a bad day or challenge myself with something new. I realize the “power” is always inside of me- I just have to have the courage to grab it and go.
Worrying will not get you no where- fast. I know it is easier said than done. It’s human nature to worry. But the more you train your mind to be in a state of peace and calm, the less likely it will bring itself on a downward spiral.
Living in the present moment allows us to accomplish far more than worrying about this problem, or that problem. We must stop waiting for the perfect moment to fix our current situation. Quit worrying about what has happened, what could be, or what should be, and begin living in the “right now.” This is when we have the opportunity to take action.
Remember, goals are not achieved by procrastinating. Success eludes those who spend their time worrying about their problems. The more you worry, the more time you spend on issues that are out of your control, the less you act – and the less you act, the less likely you are to succeed. So focus on the solution instead of worrying about the problem. You simply don’t have the time or energy to waste.
Ask yourself : What lesson do I need to learn here?
It is possible that in what you are going through now, a life lesson awaits. Allow me to let you in on a little secret of mine: I’ve learned that if I failed to learn my lesson the last time around; by life’s design, I find that I’m made to go through certain situations over and over again. Until I finally “GET IT.” Until….I learn the lesson that needs to be learned.
We all know that life is a continuous journey of ups and downs. So instead of “why me”, perhaps ask yourself if there is some key lesson that you may have missed out on and are expected to learn.
Sometimes it’s hard to have faith that you can overcome setbacks and hard times while you are in the thick of it. Keep in mind though, that we all go through valleys and peaks in our lives. Think back about the last time you went through a rough period. How did you get through it? What did you learn on the other side?
If you are on a journey because you are being fuelled by a vision, it’s important to have faith that what you aspire to bring about will come true. Constantly, keep the big picture in mind.
Keep on keeping on. And do it with a smile.
Perhaps this is the most difficult of all. Yet, we often read of accounts of how successful people have triumphed over their failures. These people succeed not just through sheer grit and tenacity but they also demonstrate a surprising amount of goodwill and light, even during the worst of times.
When you are going through difficulties, it is easy to put on a sulky face and to show it to the world. Perhaps it would help you to remind yourself that you are not the only one with problems. Remember the saying “I complained that I had no shoes until I met a man who had no feet.”
When you can set aside your ego and remove yourself from making much ado about what has gone wrong, that’s when it’s truly possible to rejoice and even feel gratitude for all of the blessings and things that are going right in your life. So, the next time life throws you a curve ball, remember, chin up! And perhaps my most favorite saying of all, what I often tell my kids, ” Suck it up, buttercup!” You can do it. You have it in you. “You have always had the power.”